Once thought of as a “hands-off topic,” the sex-positive movement has begun a change in what society calls “normal” when discussing sex. Sex-positivity covers safer sex practices, consensual sex, and the importance of personal experiences with sex. All genders and sexual orientations are a part of this social movement.
With younger generations pursuing their own sexual identities and some engaging in new norms of sex like hookup culture, sex-positivity is becoming somewhat of a gateway to new philosophical beliefs. Previously seen as a religious and personal experience to some, the sex-positive movement calls for people to experience what they like.
Television today commonly expresses the importance of safe sex with the use of condoms. Talking to your partner about their past partners and experiences is a piece of the sex-positivity pie. Knowing your status of being disease-free or not is essential; it could save both your and your partner’s life.
Sex and kink-allied therapist, Margaret Sweeney, considers the biological, psychological, and social factors that affect her patients’ sexual well-being. This is known as using the biopsychosocial model. Sex affects and is affected by our own experiences. Understanding your sexuality should never be shameful, according to Sweeney.
“The sex education in our country is terrible, and so most of us are misinformed or at least under-informed,” says Sweeney. She encourages reading about sexuality.
HIV and other STDs continue to increase in cases since their discovery in the late 1400s. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), consolidated instances of syphilis, gonorrhea, and chlamydia arrived at an unsurpassed high in the United States in 2018, as per the yearly Sexually Transmitted Disease Surveillance Report. As of October 2019, newborns are facing a recent threat of death from syphilis. Being a part of the sex-positive movement means being aware.
Although one partner may want to engage in sexual acts, the other partner may not. Sex should always be consensual. Communication between two people is critical to the future of a relationship. Having those conversations is healthy for your relationship with your partner. Unfortunately, not all discussions are so comfortable.
An uncomfortable topic of discussion that may come up when talking with your partner is the term “kink.” Kinks can be fantasies or unconventional sexual practices that someone partakes in or is interested in partaking in. Bondage, discipline, domination, submission, sadism, and masochism (BDSM) being some of the most well-known kinks.
Some may not have the outlet to speak about these topics, which is why kink-allied therapists are there to help those that may need it. Sex-positive and kink-allied therapists provide a safe and judgment-free atmosphere for those that experience kinks in their love lives or want to experiment. Having those connections with professionals provides a safe space for the individual and may shift what we consider “normal” in society.
Marriage and family therapist Micah Brown believes entertainment is progressing with sex-positivity representation; however, on a slow trend. He says it’s hard to generalize the entertainment industry as each company handles representation differently.
“I believe all of this boils down to influential people doing the work to hire a diverse range of people to work on projects. Having directors, writers, and game developers of various backgrounds is what we need to improve media representation of any topic,” says Brown. He believes Netflix shows Sex Education, and Bonding, are good examples of sex-positive television.
Sex-positivity is a broad topic with many gray areas. Speaking to sex therapists is one of the best ways to learn more about sex positivity, not just as a movement but as a way of life. If you or someone you know is struggling or confused about their sexuality, sexual lifestyle, or needs to reach out to a professional, visit the Psychology Today website to search for sex-positivity therapists in your area.
