When a child is raised with parents from different cultures, they are exposed to different perspectives and beliefs that shape how they approach the world.
In the Celtic culture, the most valuable things are said to come in threes—The Earth, the Sea, and the Sky, and the three stages of life. Representing this ideology is the Celtic knot, known also as the Triquetra or the Trinity Knot.
The Celtic knot is composed of lines woven together meeting at three key points. The knot has been adopted into many other cultures despite its Celtic origin.
The knot, a versatile and ornate symbol, adorns wedding rings, glows with sunlight streaming through stained glass church windows, and even shows up on TV shows.
Celebrating Differences
Stephen Baker’s Celtic knot is embedded in his skin, a tattoo laying directly over his heart. For him, its points represent his mom, his siblings, and his step-dad.
Like the knot, his family is woven together despite the staggering differences in their cultures.
Stephen is biracial, and he appreciates all the different cultures and people who came together to create his unique worldview.
Although Stephen wasn’t raised by his biological father, he does recognize the Irish culture passed down from him. Understanding this culture and being part of it is important to Stephen.
Stephen grew up very close with his step-dad, Nabil Boudissa. In stark contrast to his biological father, Nabil is of French-Algerian descent and is a practicing Muslim.
Mary Baker-Boudissa, Stephen’s mom, is African-American and was raised by two ordained Christian ministers.
With such a mix of different backgrounds, there was a lot of room for potential conflict.
Luckily, Stephen says all the members of his family committed to an open dialogue and willingness to learn and understand one another. To him, it was an environment of respect that shaped who Stephen is today.
As explained by an article published by the Council on Foundations, most people think of other religions or heritages when they think of culture. But what they don’t realize is that families form their own cultures.
Children are raised with a set of morals, mannerisms, and habits that they learn from family. This is the same way a culture is formed.
Discussion was an important part of life at Stephen’s home. He remembers these talks were never heated or accusatory, but rather healthy and respectful. Through the family’s conversations, they each realized that in Christianity and Islam, there are more similarities than differences.
The Rev. Seth Carrier-Ladd, of Muncie’s Universalist Unitarian Church, agreed, saying that most religions do share some commonalities. He said some areas do overlap, like promoting love, respect, kindness, and justice.
Stephen’s family came together through compromise. Nabil would enjoy Easter and Christmas with everyone, and they would join in Ramadan with him, fasting during the day and eating at night.
The Rev. Mcclain said the cultural location affects how a religion is practiced. Because of his parents’ drastically different backgrounds, Stephen feels like he had the opportunity to understand beliefs and traditions across different continents.
According to Pew Research Center, 60 percent of adults with a mixed-race family felt proud to be biracial, and Steven is one of them.
“People are from all different places, and that comes together in each one of us,” Stephen says. “It’s important to celebrate each part of that.”
A Financial Burden
I think I want to be a teacher, Brianna Bradley told her father. A second passed. He scoffed, then laughed in her face. You won’t make any money doing that, he said.
His worries for his daughter are not unfounded. According to Pew Research Center, more than 25 percent of Americans say their children will have a worse standard of living than they now have.
Money had always been a part of David Bradley’s, world. He was raised upper-middle class, graduating high school and transitioning straight into a job as a nuclear engineer for the U.S. Army. No college loans to worry about, no debt to pay back. Brianna labels him as the cool “rich kid” in high school, and half jokes that her mom fell for him because of his high-class sports car.
Her mom, Christa Vail, grew up a few blocks away, on the outskirts of a part of Elkhart locally known as “the hole.” Christa occupied what Brianna describes as a two-room “shack” with her siblings. Christa grew up using food stamps and made it through high school below the poverty line.
Sitting in her apartment, Brianna presented the same statement to her mother: Mom, I think I want to be a teacher. Her mom paused, then responded: I know.
Although from drastically different financial cultures, Davis and Christa met as teenagers, working for the same movie theater in town. As 18-year-olds, they married. According to IPPR, Christa is out of the norm. The latest generation of women, born between 1976–1981 and aged 28–33 at the beginning of this decade, are more likely to have married a partner in the same social class (56 percent) and far less likely to have a partner from a higher social class than themselves (16 percent).
Rather than their opposing backgrounds coming together, the pair often butted heads about hot issues. Christa was pro-choice, while David was vehemently pro-life. Christa was liberal while David remained conservative. Christa would always value money in a way David never had to. She’d grown up poor and experienced a much different lifestyle that contributed to her views more than David could understand. Eventually, these differences bled into their parenting styles.
By the time Brianna turned 7, her parents had filed for divorce. The clash of cultures was too much for her parents to rebuild. Reflecting on her teenage years, Brianna explains how her mother would try to solve her problems by talking through it, while she felt her dad would just try to buy her something to patch up the holes in their relationship.
Although these two cultural approaches couldn’t come together to co-exist in a marriage, they do co-exist within Brianna. She is a product of both her mother and father’s backgrounds, even if she tends to lean more on her mom’s views. From her dad, she learned money can’t always solve problems. From her mom, she learned to follow her passions. Although she does shudder at the thought of her student loan debt, she looks forward to graduating with her dual elementary and special education degree this May.
Finding Faith in Family
You need God in your life, Ashlee Baird recalls her uncle telling her.
Ashlee was raised by her Mom, who is Agnostic. She was also influenced by her grandmother, who is Christian, and her two aunts who practice Buddhism. If there was anything Ashlee wasn’t short on, it was gods.
A study by Pew Research Center found people who were raised by a parent who was not committed to a religion were more likely to grow up not identifying to a religion either. In fact, the study found that of participants who were raised by either a single parent who was not religious or by two parents where one was not religious, 62 percent of people also grew up to be unaffiliated with religion.
Jenny, Ashlee’s aunt, has been practicing Buddhism for 33 years. Although very committed to her religion, she never pressured Ashlee to conform to it. The immediate family would have discussions about religion, but in a meaningful way with the intent to learn more and support each other.
About one-in-five Americans were raised in a home made up of different religious affiliations, Pew Research Center reports. The same study found this is a trend that is growing among millennials. More than 25 percent of millennials reported growing up in interfaith homes. Ashlee’s family has a ton of different religious views, but to Ashlee, all of them had one common message: be a good person. So, that’s what she tries to do.
Ashlee did attend church for about three years, but decided an organized religion wasn’t right for her. She now identifies as atheist, a decision her immediate family supports. As for her extended family, Ashlee mostly just avoids them.
Taking time to analyze what you believe in and why you believe in it is integral, says The Rev. Carrier-Ladd. Ashlee felt free to explore religion and figure out what was right for her because her family was so diverse and accepting of different faiths. As a mom to a 5-year-old, very inquisitive daughter, Ashlee hopes to provide the same type of welcoming environment.
According to The Rev. Carrier-Ladd, says this journey is something he assists with frequently at his church. Religion, he says, has an important role in a family culture, whether that means being spiritual or just believing in something. Being in a community that holds you accountable and shares the same values is important, Carrier-Ladd says.
Ashlee wants her daughter to learn about all different kinds of people’s beliefs, not just one strong opinion. Through it all, there will be one message—be a nice person.
You need God in your life.
I think I’m doing okay, she responds.
Whether it’s a Celtic knot, a career, or a conversation, culture is embedded in family life whether it works or not. The amount of multiracial and cultural Americans is growing, with the Census Bureau projecting that the multiracial population will triple by 2060. The way families function is changing, and fast. This fusing of cultures is creating a new culture itself: one of pride, acceptance, and discussion, if we put in the effort to keep it that way.
